Eh

It's 4:15 am right now. I haven't slept. I think I'm writing this to avoid doing something stupid, like texting my ex. I'm a little bit down right now. I just found out that it's going to take an extra semester before I graduate. This doesn't seem like that big a problem, and it isn't really. It's just sort of demoralizing. I've grown to hate school. I can't stand the students, I feel too old and too cynical to carry on any sort of conversation with any of them. I don't like that feeling. I never wanted to feel old and cynical. Mainly it's the cynicism that bothers me. It's too damned late to be awake. These are the times that I miss having someone to lay next to in bed. There's so much comfort to be found in a woman's warm body pressed up against your own. The feeling of her resting heart, beating through her cotton tee, and her slowing breath, puffing out onto my chest, was able to trick my soul into believing that great lie we always tell each other whenever the world starts pushing down: everything's going to be alright, everything's fine. I miss that comfort tonight.

Insanity

If insanity is the norm, then crazy people would have to be considered sane. So, I've been thinking about checking myself into an insane asylum in order to protest the insanity of the entire world. I just had a man walk into the liquor store I work at, and ask me to recommend a good drink for his daughter. His daughter was with him. She couldn't have been older than ten. I sold him a bottle of non-alcoholic margarita mix. I don't understand what's wrong with people. The human race has been won. The winner was psychotic. He now represents all of humanity.